Stairway to Pantagruel

Written by "GLEN BOURGEOIS aka BARNEY RUBBLE," Wed, 17 Apr 1996.

Patrick Little asked:

p.s. Was "Funny Ways" the Giant equivalent of "Stairway to Heaven"?
I would hope they would refuse to play it if they reformed.

And Barney spake:

    There's a giant who's sure all progressions are odd
    And he's playing a counterpoint pattern...
    When he gets it, he'll know, 'cause he'll scare all around
    Those who program all Top-40 radios...
    Ooooohh... oh, I do miss that counterpoint pattern...

    There's a time signature, but he wants to be sure
    Cause sometimes, hooks can change on you midway
    Does it land on the one, or then maybe on three
    What the hell, no one will get it anyway...
    Ooooohh... why do people enjoy Mariah Carey?

    And it makes me wonder...

    If there's a flat note in your root chord, don't be alarmed now
    Listen to it five times and you'll get in
    Yes there are two ways you can choose from, fan or a hater,
    But there's still time to change the side you're on...

With apologies to Led Zeppelin....